When your past hunts you, it can make you sad and depressed. Be it for something that you did, or something someone did to you. It’s rough. The more you think about it, the farther down you go into your state of mind. A BIG Never Ending Spiral, SO BIG that when you reach Rock Bottom it only means you will start Digging to go even Deeper.
It is essentially a vortex that sucks the energy out of you, that sucks the LIFE out of you. It can happen to anybody at any given time! What’s scary is that you don’t know when you are in the spiral just how far down you will go and if you will ever find the strength to be able to get out of it. Sometimes it can happen that a person spirals so down that they contemplate death and harm to oneself or others.
That is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I say temporary because the event has passed. You survived. Yes we still suffer from it. For example we get burned but it will leave a mark. We get cut and it will leave sign on the skin. Even if the even it past, it will still leave a mark on us. That is natural and NORMAL. Having what hurt us define our lives is what makes it difficult to move forward. It is what why we always fall back down. It is normal to go back to those feelings, because it’s the easy thing to do, for everyone. This dose not mean you are weak. This just means you need more time and perhaps a little direction.
Take for example this simple concept: You can drive nails through a piece of wood, you can then decide to take these nails out of the wood. What happens to the wood? Even if you take away the nails, the holes are left. Apply that concept to yourself so with a little hope you can understand that what you are going through right now is not because you are weak or that you can’t help to change yourself, but rather it is a normal thing in all areas of life. Let me be more specific. The nails are why you are hurting. You are the piece of wood. Even if the nails have already been taken out, you can still feel the pain due to the holes they left.
Dose that mean that the wood is useless and it is not worth anything? NO! Infact it is the total opposite. Those holes do not define the piece of wood. It is just something it went through. However horrible that can be. With time it will learn to accept itself and put itself to good use. What is important is that it dose not end itself when it’s going down that downward spiral.
When you find yourself in that spiral. Fighting is will not help you. You are already tired and out of willpower. Exhausted of the downward trend, confused to why it happened to you, fighting it will not let you win but rather discourage you. Think of if like this. If you are tired and unmotivated, that last thing you will want to do it enter a boxing ring to fight somebody or worse, to fight YOURSELF!
IF I should not fight it, what is left? Accept it?? Absolutely not. Ignoring a problem or a feeling will not solve your current state! By ignoring or accepting it, the only thing you are doing is fueling the downward spiral. Take this example extracted from everyday life. If you find yourself in a traffic jam inside a city, what do you do? Ram Through it? No way! You look for a side street! A better view of this is this, What happens when you find yourself in a Rip Current? For anyone that dose not know, a Rip Current is a natural phenomenon that happens in the ocean, they are strong invisible underwater currents that push you out to sea! Rip Currents claim many lives every year. So, what do you do when you find yourself in a Rip Current that is brining you out to sea? The natural instinct is to FIGHT the current. Just like you would try to fight the downward spiral you are in. But what happens when you do that? You get tired, and more tired and eventually you loose hope because even though you are fighting so hard against the current, the shoreline is getting father and farther away.
What is the solution? Never go head on. They say to swim sideways, so that you can swim away from the current in a gradual way. Do you see the connection? You are not going against the current but rather you are deflecting it. Once you swim sideways enough, eventually you will leave the dreadful Rip Current and be able to swim back to the Sea Shore. Yes, while you swim sideways the Rip Current is still taking you out to sea, but you are not fighting against it. So once you finally swim out of if it means that: 1) You are not in the middle of the Ocean because you did not let it take OVER YOU! 2) You still have energy to swim to safety. I hope you get the analogy, whish is: Ignoring a problem is not a solution. Having it take over you is NOT a solution. FIGHTING it is not a solution.
You are probably asking yourself, How DO I Sideline My Downward Spiral State of Mind By Not Fighting It? You can do that by changing what influences around you. Yes You might not feel like it, or you might not even have the energy to do anything. That is understandable. What I suggest, other the praying since that takes energy, it to Listen to happy music, positive music, Cheerful Music. Put on a funny video, watch a comedy. These things go beyond your ACTIVE mind. Even if you don’t listen to the music or watch the movie. Your mind will still hear the music and the movie audio. Hearing a person laugh will produce stimulants inside your body, having a cheerful tune and beat will stimulate your body to match those vibrations AUTOMATICALLY. There is No effort from you. Just let it run and you will find yourself matching the mood of the current stimulus of what you put on. This way you STOP the downward spiral and become in the position to reverse it with no effort.
The most important thing you can do is to NEVER put on something sad, dramatic, or in anyway negative when you feel that way. That would be fueling the fire of the downward Spiral. It might sounds like a stupid thing, but the first step is to stop the downward trend.
Once you have stopped the downward trend, once you learn how to stop it in the future too. You can create a happy playlists and download positive happy comedy movies when you come across them so they are quick to access whenever the times comes. You can be in at school or work or home or anywhere! Just take a few mintuues and go listen to a happy song (in the bathroom, or in the car, or in your room, even on a bench in a park). Most times this will happen when you have time to dive back in the past. Chances are at home it hits hardest.
Once you can stop the spiral, once you are back to “normal” safe state of mind, you can also think of ways to close those holes that we mentioned at the beginning. Find a purpose for those holes do not define you but rather they make you a stronger person. What you have been through is not easy. But your strength and perseverance is commendable. It will take you places you never thought possible. You can accomplish new things, persue the goals you thought you could not achieve, or even feel inspired to make new goals that reflect what you have been through so that you can help other people! Maybe Write a book, offer advice, become a role model and INSPIRATION to someone that is going through what you went through.
That can ONLY HAPPEN once you stop your own downward spiral and make sure you don’t go TOO DEEP. So deep that you don’t come back out of it! You are worth more then that, You Deserve to stay on this earth because you can help so many people, achieve so many things. You Deserve God!